The End of the Milk Maid Journey

I mentioned in my 8 month update on LM that 8 months marked the end of my pumping journey.
And while I've documented most of my journey in some capacity here, I surely could not leave out the end.
I will say, the end and deciding it was the end, was not a decision that I came by lightly, quickly or easily.

Mister and I had a LOT of conversations, tears (just me), prayers and thoughts that went into the decision.  Funnily enough, most of these happened while I was pumping.

From the beginning (and because our feeding journey did not begin or continue as I had thought it would while being pregnant), I said I would continue to pump until I could not stand it. While providing the upmost and best nutrition for LM is our top priority, so is Mama's sanity and quality of life.  I do not and never had anything against formula.  My train of thought was always 'why not give him breast milk as long as I can and when that's no longer an option we make the switch.'  The adage 'fed is best' is forever true and the best thing you can do for your child.

Around 6 months I began to think about when I wanted to stop pumping.  At the beginning I wanted to pump until he was a year but because I started out exclusively pumping 8x a day for months, I began to scale back that time frame as there were days my sanity began to dwindle.
For many, many days and months it was a lot of work.  Work I am VERY happy I did but still work.

Once LM was more mobile, fun and active I felt like I was beginning to miss out on bits of his day and interacting with him.  With his age and the warming weather we were out and about more but that always had to revolve around my pumping schedule and what time of the day it was, where we were going to be, etc.

 Who wouldn't rather hang out with this smiley babe?

At 7 months I decided I would start to scale back and start the process of slowing down and eventually stopping.  I have a post planned on how I actually went through that process.  I found there is not a lot of good information out there on that process and I feel the need to dedicate an entire post to that.
So with that decision Mister and I began a lot of conversations on the pros and cons and what stopping looked like.  I went back and forth approximately a million times on whether to actually stop or not.  What kept ringing in my head was 'why would I stop making this thing that is 100% perfectly made for my sweet baby?'  And I could not get that out of my head.
My mom said 'you've grown that boy from 3lbs 5.6oz and that's incredible.'  Mister kept saying 'we have freezer milk to use, he's had SO much of your milk and you've done so much work, it's really okay.'  Mister was (and is) 100% supportive in all facets and especially pumping.
And while he is my biggest cheerleader, I think he was ready to have his semi sane, not hooked up to a machine wife back ;)
As I've said and documented I was lucky enough to have freezer milk stored up.  While we knew it wouldn't last forever or be enough for him to have freezer milk completely, it did help knowing we had that.

I could probably talk about this for hours but I'll spare you ;)

Pumping at Work

Now that I've been back at work about a month I feel like I am in a groove with pumping during the work day.

I talked about pumping at home here and here if you need a refresher. Or just contact me at any point in the day because generally I am either pumping, thinking about pumping or trying to eat and drink enough so I can pump later on. 

The long and the short of it is that pumping at work is a lot of work (setting up and repacking) but it is nice to have a break from my desk twice a day.

If I could give any advice about pumping at work it is to make sure you are prepared in every facet.  You essentially need to be a traveling pump gypsy with all of your things.  Think through your day and your pumping process and triple check you have everything you need.

To make sure I was ready and felt prepared, I went ahead and purchased 2 of all of my pumping essentials (besides a pump) to make sure that I always have what I need with me at all times.  The other key item is a bag to hold all of your things.  There are some really adorable pumping bags out there that hold your pump but I am actually just using a  diaper bag we received as a gift.  It's huge, doesn't look like a diaper bag and holds of my things, it's a winner.  

Through some trial and error I have a pretty well oiled machine of pump bag essentials:

Pump (duh)

Milk storage bags 

Sharpie (to date your bags)

Pump parts (bottles with lids, flanges, membranes, tubing)

Ziploc bag to hold parts

Hands free bra

SNACKS

Water bottle (I found a Gatorade type water add in I've been using and it's great!)

Lunch box/ice pack

Paper towel (for setting parts on)

Car charger (not needed for work but very handy for pumping in the car and it stays in my bag)

Travel size dish soap

My pumping schedule changes slightly every day but I'm currently on a 4 hour schedule it goes something like this:

6am: Pump and pack up pump

10am: Pump, package milk in storage bags and date

2pm: Pump, combine milk in one bottle and TIGHTLY secure with a lid

6pm: Pump, wash up all of my parts and repackage for the next day, make up bottles

I then proceed to check about 9 times if I have everything.

10pm: Pump

I try to get as much ready the night before as I can because I am pressed for time in the mornings and do not want to have to worry about it.  

I keep my parts in a lunchbox in the fridge and that has a dual purpose.  1- to keep the milk cold, of course and 2- so I don't have to wash my parts each time I pump.  This saves a ton of time and sanity. 

Any questions or items I don't have in my bag that I should??

Milk Maid : Part 2

First of all, thank you everyone for your sweet comments and encouragement on my previous pumping post!!  You guys are the best!

I will admit when I began this pumping journey I had NO idea it would entail so much and that so much goes into it.  Thankfully (praise God) I am blessed with a decent supply and that helps encourage me to keep going.  I know some ladies are not as lucky.  With that, I am not above trying all the tips, foods and techniques to help bump up that supply as much as I can.

I have done a lot of googling and question asking regarding supply, how/when to pump, what to eat and drink to help supply and the pumping process.  I thought I would corral that information for you here if anyone needs it!  There is PLENTY more online (and some good Facebook groups) and plenty I still don't know but here are the things that have helped me.

FOOD/DRINK:

Simply, what you put in your body directly effects a lot of your milk output.

To increase and keep up my supply I eat and drink a combination of the following on any given day/week:

Almonds

Avocado
WATER

Whole grain cereals

Oatmeal (not instant)

WATER

Gatorade (some say the blue specifically but I don't think the color matters much)

Mothers Milk Tea

Hummus

Leafy greens

Smart Water

MORE WATER

Carrots

and generally just eating more helps as well.  They say you need to consume about 500-600 extra calories a day to keep up.  Honestly I have to remind myself of that most days.  

I make these bars literally every week to snack on (I add flax seeds) and also eat a few handfuls of trail mix during the day.
I also take Fenugreek 3x a day.  I just started this recently and I am pretty sure it's helping.

TIME:
I mentioned in my original post that I spend about 2 hours a day pumping.  I do my best to pump every 3 hours during the day and every 4 at night.  It's exhausting but worth it to get Little Mister the milk he needs.
The time of day can definitely effect your amounts. I get the most in the middle of the night (which keeps me going when I don't want to get up) and first thing in the morning.  I tend to not get as much in the early evening but sometimes that is due to not drinking enough water around that time.

So much of pumping is supply and demand.  The more you body thinks you need, the more it will make.  To help this, I have started pumping on one side and nursing on the other for a few sessions a day if I can.  It is a juggling act but I think it helps plus then I don't have to spend an additional 15 minutes pumping.

TIPS:
There are a couple of different apps out there that track your milk and nursing.  When Little Mister was in the NICU I used Milk Maid to track how much milk I took in each day and was really pleased with it.  It was the best one I could find that only tracked pumping amounts (not nursing times).

Did you know you that you don't have to wash your pump parts every time you pump?  They can be put in the fridge until your next session and be perfectly fine! This is such a time saver.  You should wash them at least once a day though.

Nursing tanks and bras are real lifesavers.
Here are the pieces I've been living in:
Tanks
Sleep bra
 Bra

Again, I could talk about this all day so let me know if you have any questions!
Chelsea also recently wrote a very helpful guide to pumping that is worth checking out! 

Milk Maid

*Warning: this post is about breastfeeding/pumping and includes photos of breast milk.  This is also not a discussion for or against breast vs bottle, I just wanted to share a a little about our breastfeeding and pumping journey because it has been somewhat unique.

Even before we decided to have a baby, I have always been a huge fan and advocate of breastfeeding.  For one, its free and two, it is highly proven to be great for the baby.  But again, free. I like free.  Plus I always imagined the connection between a nursing mother and baby must be amazing (and it is).  

So when we did find out we were expecting, I was already day dreaming of that first skin to skin moment and breastfeeding in the delivery room.  As we know this is not how our journey began, but I thought I would share how our journey did begin and how it has continued.

Obviously I did not get to nurse Little Mister when he was born.  A few hours later when the nurse asked if I planned on breastfeeding him down the road.  I said yes and she informed me that in order to get my milk started it was best if I pumped within 12 hours of delivery.  (Human bodies are incredible.)  This meant I had to pump for the first time by 5am and with the whirlwind of the day we had, I don't think I actually did until midnight or so, but by golly I wasn't going to miss that opportunity.

Admittedly, (in my delirium) at first I did not fully grasp the fact that I couldn't just go down to the NICU and nurse Little Mister and be on our breastfeeding way.  As the nurses and lactation consultants explained to me, if I wanted to provide Little Mister with my milk, pumping would become my life.  I needed to start pumping and keep it up every 2 hours and he would be fed via a feeding tube with my milk, once it came in.  Once that sunk in, it became (and continues to be) to my goal to provide him with as much milk as possible.  We felt SO helpless with him in the NICU, pumping at least gave me something to do and something to feel like I was contributing to.

With him being a preemie it took even longer for my milk to come in but I kept at it while in the hospital, every 2 hours.  There were quite a few 15 minute pumping sessions that resulting in literally NOTHING coming out of my body.  Talk about feeling defeated.  

The hospital had give us syringes to collect my milk/colostrum (if any) in and transport to the NICU. For a while, I was 100% certain I would never have anything to take to the NICU.  They kept encouraging me to keep trying and keep going and that any little drop was helpful and they would add it to the milk they were giving him.

I will never forgot the session I was able to get ONE tiny drop.  I somehow was able to transfer that ONE drop into a syringe and practically ran it down to the NICU.  

It's hard to tell but there is ONE tiny drop in there.  And that's also the last time my nails were painted.

I have no idea if they were even able to use it or not but in my head they did and that was all I needed to keep going.

There were a few times I dropped the TINY amounts that I had produced and (hormone induced) tears ensued.  It was VERY hard to transfer the drops from the bottle to the syringe because there was so little. 

Talk about feeling defeated.  But I soldiered on for the sake of Little Mister's growing body.  

Slowly (very slowly) but surely I would get a little bit more each time.  I remember Mister and I rejoicing when I got 3ML and on the final morning we were there, 8ML (!!).  I could hardly believe it. 

Finally once we were home for a few days my milk FINALLY came in.  What takes normal mamas about 3-4 days took me about 6 because of the premature birth.  

The hospital provided us with 3oz bottles to collect milk in and labels for those bottles.  The process was to pump at home (or in the NICU) and then return the milk to the hospital when we visited each day.  I continued to pump and pump (every 2 hours, 3 at night) and collect what I could.  In the beginning I only had a few, barely filled bottles, to turn in.  (Each pumping session had to be collected in a separate bottle.) 

Again, I'll never forget the day that I had 7 (then 9 and 10) bottles to take down, that was the most I had ever had!

Progress was being made and I was finally feeling successful with all the pumping I was doing.

This continued on and I was getting to where I was averaging 10-12 bottles a day to take down and had to move up to a bigger cooler.  All of these, seemingly, small steps helped encourage me to keep going.  Especially when it was 2:30am and I was dog tired from getting up in the middle of the night every single night.  Knowing that I was able to provide for Little Mister was incredibly encouraging.  The more milk I took to the NICU, the more they were able to give him in his bottles.  Another progress step was the day they told me all of his feeds were 100% my milk and no added formula.  I was SO excited.  Feeling like I was contributing to his growth when we weren't able to provide for him 100% of the time made me feel very good.

And this is the pattern I continued on for quite a few weeks.  Pumped at home, pumped at the NICU and handed in all of my milk.  One day the nurse told me to stop bringing in my milk because my drawer was full with over 100 bottles!  This was awesome.  One, it was one less thing to take to the hospital and two I was able to start my freezer stash at home.  I use these bags to freeze milk at home.  Thankfully I've been able to build up quite a stash at home which makes me very happy.  We are trying not to dip into too much right now but it sure is comforting to know it's there.

I also started being able to nurse him while in the NICU for at least one feeding a day.  When he was so little and young, one was plenty as it was very exhausting to him.  It was also suggested to me to use a nipple shield when nursing him because he/preemies do not have the stamina or power to breastfeed like a term baby does.  We still use one now because it is way easier for him.  Hopefully as he continues to grow we will do away with it as his strength and stamina increase.  

Right now I am continuing to pump every day and night and use what I pump during these sessions for his daily bottles.  And on a good day, have a little extra to freeze.  Along with pumping I also try to breastfeed him a least a couple times a day before his bottle.   He still does not have the stamina to do a full feed nursing but hopefully one day!

Because of this I don't fall into the exclusively pumping club or the exclusively breastfeeding club.   But whatever we're doing, so far it's working so we will keep it up!  As of yesterday he is up to 9lbs 14oz!!

Feed me, Mama!

I am planning on doing a separate post on what foods I eat, my exact schedule and what seems to work and what doesn't for best milk production from what I've learned so far.

I won't lie, it is A LOT of work and I spend at least 2 hours of my day and night hooked to a machine.  I am constantly doing math concerning the times of the day and planning my day around my pumping schedule and his eating schedule but knowing that he is growing well is enough to keep going for as long as I can.